mysplatsen

Tar livet slut vid 40, och vad innebär det att vara lyckad?

2010-09-05T08:18:00.003Z

Nu är man snart där. Ja. Förti alltså. Här sitter jag i min lägenhet. Ingen man. Inga barn. Jag kan inte låta bli att fråga mig själv: Hur är man när man är lyckad? Måste man följa nån speciell mall? Blir man lycklig av bebisen? Blir man lycklig av den där designade Marimekkogardinen? Eller slutar man till slut prata med varandra, förutom när man diskuterar färgkoder till väggarna som ska målas?

Jag vet inte längre om jag längtar till det livet. Man följer en trappa och klättrar upp för den, för det har liksom alla andra gjort. Men måste man? Nä, så klart inte. Men kan man finna sann lycka i sig själv, i det man faktiskt har här och nu, och - ännu viktigare - nöja sig med det?

Jag konstaterar snabbt att jag är tacksam för att jag är frisk, att mina föräldrar är friska och att jag har en massa underbara vänner. Jag är tacksam för att jag har en inre drivkraft som gör att jag inte bara lägger mig ner och väntar på att livet ska komma till mig. Jag går ut och tar för mig. Ensam, om det så krävs.

Vad innebär det att vara lyckad då? Egentigen är det ju väldigt individuellt - men tror att de flesta slänger sig in i nästa fas bara för att det är en smidig mall, ungefär som när man skapar sin bloggsida, det finns något färdigt att fortsätta till. Nytänket, att gå ifrån allt det där, är jobbigare. Känner du att du har det du vill ha, just nu? Kanske sitter du där i ditt egendesignade hem, med din man och dina två barn. Du borde vara lycklig men det är något som saknas. Något känns bara tomt.

Inte vet jag. Men för min del börjar det bli mer och mer uppenbart att det inte finns något facit. Vill man bo själv och njuta av sitt liv utan att följa den där mallen, kan det nog bli minst lika bra ändå, även att jag inte riktigt är överrens med mig själv ännu. Träffar man Mr Right så gör man.

And another

2009-11-04T20:20:00.001Z

The song we filmed before the previous one. A bit better I think.

Last Day Impressions

2009-11-03T16:13:00.002Z

Last day. Last morning. Last eggs. Last goodbyes.
I've had an amazing time here. People have made me feel very welcome and special. I owe alot to Tom for that. I've been dancing loads - 9 nights in total. I've probably gotten more experienced on the dance floor even if last nights dancing didn't show the results I was after. Sure important to take the steps, but right now, I'll work on trying to mirror what the guy is doing. I don't really want to go home, but I guess I'm going to have to. I like my life back home too, and it's going to be great to see my friends again.

Last dance with Mr Tom

2009-11-03T09:13:00.002Z

Last night of dancing. I had loads of fun dances, and the music was nice, and choppy, albeit a bit too much of the same thing. Danced with all kinds of people including four dances with Tom which is alot. He's been telling me earlier to try to be more upright and I'm working on that, and also taking smaller steps than before. But then today, things didn't turn out the way I had plannned, First, I hit him on the nose with my elbow. How embarrassing. Then, we filmed one song and I'm focused on doing my triple steps like I've been told by everybody. After the dance he says: Do you want an evaluation of your dancing? Yeah of course I did. He said: "Are you aware of how much you move" "You move so much you're making me exhausted and you're using up all your energy". I realized then, that I'm just doing the step at all costs, at all times, and I'm not mirroring the guy, at least not here. I want to be able to follow everybody, not just Swedes, and not just Swedes in my own dance community. We all speak different dialects, and I can understand and speak my own, but clearly not everyone else's. Yet. There are alot of things that have improved though, but hell, I'm kinda pissed off right now, and I'm going to get those things fixed. Crap ending. Again. Well, I'm gonna fix that too.

I danced with this guy!

2009-11-02T14:14:00.002Z

I've been dancing quite alot with a guy who is just here visiting. The one who is travelling the country in his mobile home that I told you about? I found a clip at Larry's of him doing the ProAms with Carla! He'll be there tonight too, I think.

Elan and Cheesecake Factory

2009-11-02T14:06:00.002Z

I should have bought the cheesecake itself, NOT the popcorn shrimp! Oh well. Another time. Today after classes at Elan we went to Cheesecake Factory to eat, and then Tom drove me home. We talked alot today, and it was really really great. Earlier in the day I'd had brunch with Larry and Bob, and afterwards I spent alot of time talking to Bob about dancing, while Larry was watching his football game.

Spent the day with Tom, finished off with The Boilermakers

2009-11-01T04:55:00.003Z

Tom asked if I wanted to hang out for a bit, so I took the Metro to Vienna/Fairfax, where he lives. He picked me up after like 45 minutess, and took me to Artie's - a restaurant which serves classic American food. I had crab cakes, he had chicken club sandwich. Was very good. I got the check this time. We went home to his beautiful house, the biggest I've ever seen. The President could well live there, that's how beautiful it is. I played with Raymond, his youngest son, who is 3. Lovely kid! So cute! They were all going to their cousins to go trick-or-treating in the rain, so they dropped me off at the metro station.

Larry and I got ready to go to Glen Echo. The Boilermakers were playing. Some highlights were "Sweet Sue". Naomi Uyama was the singer. I think they were good, but the young crowd here think they're the bees knees - I think they are highly overrated. Nonetheless, I had really fun dancing tonight despite the absence of Tom & Deb. I think, however, that T&D's dances have a much more welcoming, warmer feel to them, these younger kids stand around in groups talking and/or dancing. I didn't get turned down when I asked some of them to dance, but alot of them looked at the floor and not at me. There were exceptions though which I liked.

My request

2009-10-31T15:49:00.002Z

I so would love to have Tom pick his favourite three songs of all time, bring them to Elan Dance center tomorrow night, and dance them with me, and put that on tape as a memory. But without any type of instruction or feedback, just go with the music and dance, no matter what happens. I really wish that could happen.

Tom & Debra's Halloween Dance at CCB

2009-10-31T13:06:00.002Z

Went to lunch with Bob Kleinpeter, who treated us. I laughed so hard. This guy is funny and can really tell some crazy stories: "I always dance with some beginners. This girl comes up to me and asks me to dance. She's all nervous and says "I'm just a beginner." Don't worry about that, I said, we've all been there. Just don't embarrass me in front of my friends". Very funny guy. Will look forward to dancing with him some more tonight and film some.

Stayed home during the afternoon and watched dance clips. Larry took me to CCB where Tom and Deb had their dance. I saw fat ladies with bare legs dressed up as cats, and other horrible things, and nobody there seemed to be able to know how to dance very much except two people or three. I danced with an older guy from Michigan. Retired, had a mobile home and escaped the colder months with his wife to other cities and they dance wherever they go. He was great!!

As the night progressed, more good dancers came in. I danced alot with a guy called Dave (not the Dave from the other day), Joe, and also Tom. Tom gave me useful feedback today and I had fun dances with him. Debra also gave me feedback. Afterwards, Tom and I went by ourselves to Metro 29 - a Diner. There were loads of people there, a Halloween Party, Anyway, we talked about everything as usual, and I had a great time. He paid for dinner which made me happy. Talked in the car too, and decided to meet up again this afternoon, ie Saturday. I'll brief on that later. Tonight, there's the Halloween dance at Glen Echo which Larry and I will go to.

Downtown DC and steakhouse dinner

2009-10-30T02:20:00.003Z

Today a guy called Dave Dante who is also a dancer, took me to see some stuff downtown DC. We went to the Bureau of printing and engraving where they make the dollar bills. Then we went to the Smithsonian Museum of American History, saw the Washington monument, had lunch in a restaurant, went up in the old Postal office Pavillion building to watch the view, and finally went to Smithsonian Museum of Natural History. Would like to have seen the air and space museum, but I'll try to do that before I go.

This evening Tom took us all out to a restaurant, and I was happy about that. He really is something special. I had a Cosmopolitan and felt pretty damn content with life!

Lost Dog Café & Nick's Nightclub

2009-10-29T04:04:00.004Z

Didn't have breakfast this morning. Instead, we went to the Lost Dog café and had two beers and a pizza. All the nutritients you could ever ask for! After that, I headed off for some quick shopping at the mall. Bought a pair of jeans and some high heels.

In the evening, we went to Nick's a nightclub but it's more like one of these little bars you see in American movies filled with guys in hats and country music blasting from the speakers. The dancers tonight weren't that great, to be honest. I enjoyed dancing with Dabe, Bob Kleinpeter and of course Larry too. And Dave Dante. I'm going to go into DC with him tomorrow and he's going to show me around. Hence, it's sleepy time.

Tue at Clarendon Ballroom

2009-10-28T04:18:00.002Z

Wrote two nice emails this morning that made me feel really good for the rest of the day. Larry took me to his friend's kid's birthday party. Two professional dancers - Thomas and Tricia who live nearby. Their kid Jamie was adorable. Stayed for awhile, met Tricia's Swedish friend from Huddinge and her two daughters. It made me feel like I wanted to keep in touch with people from high school again. Must do that.

Fell asleep for a few hours during the day, and then I left for Clarendon Ballroom which here in Arlington. It's a great place, last time the electricity went, and today it's leaking through the ceiling (aparently has done so since forever too). Tom danced with me, and told me he wants more resistance in my frame, especially in the fast songs. He tried the skipping lindy which I've never done, the jump charleston which apparently they stole from Eric and Sylvia - and his trademark skip. I wasn't up to scratch to mirror that so quickly. Must ask him to teach me again on Friday. I feel stupid too taking up people's precious time by asking them to teach me stuff. I had three dances with him in total including the last song. Very good dancing there.

I helped them move PA system etc, and I got a ride home from Tom again. We drove around for a bit, and we stayed in the car talking again. I'm so flattered he enjoys it just as much as I do. I really am lucky to have such a great person in my life.

Monday Night at CCB

2009-10-27T12:04:00.002Z

Slept late. Went on treadmill for an hour. Felt great! At 8, Bob Kleinpeter took me to the dance, and again, I was introduced by Tom, lovely lovely Tom. He's such a wonderful guy. The dance afterwards was no more than OK. Not so many good people to dance with although I had a few nice moments, the nicest being the last song of the evening: That's not my Name, by the Ting Tings. Five Fun minutes with Tom Koerner on the floor. Went out to eat after, and I reunited with Dave, a guy I met here last year. He'll probably take me out on the town on Friday. Tom drove us home, and when I arrived, it was POURING down with rain. I mean really pouring. It was interesting trying to run for the door there...

Brunch, rest and classes

2009-10-26T08:42:00.003Z

Had brunch with Larry today. Walked to a quaint little place with a really nice buffet. I've told myselt to stay easy on the food over here, but it's hard on days like this. Some pancakes, maple-glazed sausages and scrambled eggs, yummy! I stayed on in town and did some shopping. Rested for most of the afternoon, and then Larry gave me a ride to Elan dance center, where I took a Charleston class with Tom. He kept telling them stories of how we started talking on Skype. I learned a few new moves: Swedish S-turn, Larry's move and jumping Charleston. Lovely.

After class, Tom and Debra took me to the Silver Diner. I had a Ceasar salad. Delicious. They told me their story, and how they met Fayard Nicholas for the first time. I was flattered to have them telling me all this stuff. We also talked about running a swing dance business, and I learned alot from that. Tom drove me home.

Woke up 3 am. Silly jetlag.

Glen Echo

2009-10-25T13:01:00.002Z

Today was very humid. Indian summer at its best but with the additional light drizzle. The changing leaves are beautiful. I wish I had someone to share all this with right now, Larry gave me a ride into the shops and I bought some neat shirts and had a pretzel with spinach and feta for lunch. Came back home and practised some styling upstairs. I love the mirrors because you get instant feedback that way.

Went to Glen Echo with Larry. Got there at the end of Tom and Debra's class at 8.45. There were sooo many people there. I danced constantly the whole night. Dancing with Tom again was perfect. I really am a lucky girl. We danced two dances yesterday. Because it was his and Debra's dance, they were both busy working the room. I was introduced by Tom from stage, and everyone wanted to dance with me. Lucky me.

Afterwards, we had food and drinks in a Diner nearby. I had a grilled cheese sandwich with bacon and some tea. John Mortenson, a dancer and a pilot, was there too. Nice guy. Funny with people you're only friends with on Facebook... :) Tom gave me a ride home and I was back around 1.30 am. Still quite jetlagged...

Arriving in DC

2009-10-24T09:56:00.003Z

Dancing on Thursday was like floating on air. I think something is working now, that never worked before. Very very very cool feeling. I had to say goodbye to all my friends which was okay since I'll only be here for 12 days. But the sad part was saying goodbye to Anton who is leaving for China soon to work for six weeks, and to Olle and Johan who are leaving for Egypt the day I return. I didn't go to bed at all on Thursday, just stayed up all night and packed.

The trip here was okay apart from a 1,5 hour delay from Kastrup, which meant we had to run through Shiphol (it's huge) with lugggage. I didn't think I could run, but I think I'm going to have to thank lindy hop with greater over-all fitness.

Arrived at 6 ish pm. Larry picked me up at the airport. When we got back Larry gave me two really good beers, from microbreweries around here. Made me a bit tipsy. Danced some with Larry, then watched loads of Lindy clips with him upstairs where he has turned the house into a dance studio.

Went to be at ten - woke up at five. PHew. Today's plan: excersise on treadmill, relax and tonight, meet Tom and Debra at Glen Echo!!

Sauna on Sövdesjön

2009-10-19T12:09:00.006Z

8 degrees C in the air, and 7 in the water. 12 people on a raft-like boat which consisted of a sauna with a stove for wood in the middle. Windows on all sides. Nice autumn colours outside. Bloody wonderful. A really cool, and indeed cooling experience. I thoroughly recommend it to anyone seeking something a little different. Something even more bizarre occurred when I accidentally left all my dry underwear in the car. This resulted in me driving back to Ali's house in the robe... Funny times. :)

Sauna on a boat in Sövdesjön.

Thanks to Ali for arranging this beautiful day. We went to his place after, and made lasagna, drank some wine and talked alot.

Love,
xxx

The T-bone and the outdoors

2009-10-11T18:46:00.004Z

Went to a friend's house and had a small BBQ. Olle, me, Johan Norin, Johanna and her boyfriend Carter were there. Lovely evening with some wine and really lovely food. I loved it. Pretty nice to stand outdoors too in the cold with gloves on! I really do lead a pretty nice life.

I never used to live this kind of life. It's just turned out to be something absolutely extraordinary.

Segelflyg i Landskrona

2009-09-20T21:40:00.009Z

Bestämde hastigt och lustigt att jag skulle följa med Olle och flyga segelflyg idag på Landskrona Flygklubb där han är aktiv både som skolchef och smörgåstårteexpert. Fint initiativ, som jag blev väldigt glad över. Klart man måste hänga med på en sån grej. Fick tjusiga rundturen av klubbstugan och hangaren, hörde gamla-i-gemet-gubbarna sitta och prata flyghistorier, vilket fick mig att tänka på när jag var liten och det lät likadant i mitt vardagsrum. Olle visade vad de olika mätarna betydde och efter att ha krängt på sig tjusiga illblå fallskärmsmojängen var man redo att starta. Han bak. Jag fram.

Väl uppe i luften var det ingen termik alls (vart har jag hört uttrycket "light cats förrut?), vilket förvånade mig lite. Det är en känsla som är svår att beskriva. Det känns nästan lite overkligt att sitta där och sväva fram, ljudlöst och lyssna på vinden. Lite som att sitta ensam vid havet och lyssna på vågorna, fast från ovan. Men bara nästan. Man känner sig ganska liten där man sitter, men känslan är mäktig och jag kan tänka mig att när man flyger själv för första gången är det nog rätt oslagbart. Utsikten var magnifik - man såg halva världen kändes det som. (Det gjorde man naturligtvis inte, men det kändes så då). Tror vi var uppe på 1500 meters höjd, eller något sånt. Fick testa att spaka lite också, och det var jättekul! Insåg dock snabbt min talangbegränsning när Olle frågade mig om jag visste var flygfältet var någonstans och jag fick svara negativt på den frågan.

Har ni åkt berg-och-dalbana på taken av hotellen i Las Vegas nångång? Det är väl det närmsta man kan komma vad gäller det som hände sen. Som tur är har jag tre kronor på banken om jag händelsevis skulle råka bli skadeståndsskyldig till stackars Olle som nog blev döv på köpet, i nåt svagt ögonblick då man inte visste vad som var upp och ner.

Pappa Leif som har varit pilot tyckte detta var minst lika kul som jag, trots att han inte var där, och berättade att han just rotat fram sitt gamla segelflygcert inbundet i brunt linne med gult och blått band, och att det där står inskrivet: "Bergfalke".

"Släpade" mest på den tiden (tidigt 60tal)på Kronobergshed och Ålleberg...kommer väl ihåg en härlig sommardag på K-hed med över 60 starter..."

Plans and things

2009-09-08T19:38:00.002Z

I've just booked a ski-trip with some of my friends. We'll go to France in February. I haven't seen a pair a skis (let alone used them) since I was...what? 13? 12? Will be interesting to see if it's like riding a bike.

I've been doing a bit of tap dancing lately. I never thought I would like it, but I'm really enjoying it alot. At least when I remember the patterns. I think I'll have to film it soon and practise a bit. I don't really have anywhere to practise right now, which is a bit of a shame. Maybe we'll get a place to hang out with our tap shoes once a week.

Other than that, life consists of gym, dance work and social life - like it should. Life is gorgous just now. I'm loving it.

Oh yes!

2009-08-30T09:54:00.002Z

Today I'm proud of where I am in my life. I've spent alot of time recently trying to implement some easy routines - like eating breakfast (harder than you would think), and keeping my flat clean and tidy and, most importantly, spending more time alone, and relying on the fact that people WILL contact me even if I choose not to initiate it. I love organizing events, parties, get-togethers of all kinds - but I've realized, that there are more people out there who are perfectly capable of doing it too.

I've spent alot of time in the gym, losing quite alot of weight and just gaining more control over my body the way it moves, or rather, the way I choose to move it. To me, there are two things that prevents me from taking a huge step on the Lindy Ladder - 1.lack of body control, due to poor general fitness and 2. a mental block, which is only there, really, because the body control-thing doesn't work like it should. I find, as I work out more, I become more aware of what's going on, and I feel stronger, I realize when I have bad posture or jump around too much. This in effect, makes me feel more confident - and as I see the changes coming, in the mirror, it's easier for me to let go of that stupid mental block.

Come on, just bring it on! I'm ready.

Tangopalatset!

2009-08-21T12:45:00.004Z

We started a new season at Tangopalatset yesterday. It was great to be back!

At school, we had a Banana theme day. I made short movies with my groups, and one came out like this:

These are the people I work with: Maria, Håkan (new guy) and Micke. All wearing something yellow because of the Banana theme.

Herrängnatten

2009-08-15T13:56:00.007Z

Yesterday I organized an event called Herräng Night on the jetty by the beach overlooking the harbour and the skyline (if there ever was one). Absolutely stunning! About thirty people came and I had some people helping out with music, sound and baking.

We started at 9 pm and about 30 people showed up, in good spirits.

Olle Lybegård, official lighter.

Christina, Henrik, Annette, Ali & Johanna. Henrik is a dance teacher in Malmö, Johanna is a very good DJ (and great dancer too).

We danced, danced and danced some more. Had a little bit of wine, coffee and banana bread - a bit of shim sham, warm blankets and a last dance later... before we knew, it was 6 am and Ali and I had one last dance before leaving. It was daylight as we walked on the jetty on our way home.

Thanks to everybody who showed up for fantastic dances, and for making this one of the most memorable nights ever. Totally priceless.

Here's the last dance. 6 am after what? Nine hours of dancing, some wine and a swim in the sea. Not pretty, but that's not the point.

Photos by Ali Lindgren.

Time stood still for a moment

2009-08-10T13:34:00.002Z

Had a talk, which turned out to be a good, long, heartfelt talk with a friend of mine last Sunday. I'm very happy we talked, because we needed to clarify what was going on. Anyway, that all took up alot of energy, and I'm ready to move on. For a few days now, I haven't felt the need to socialize at all. I think it's because it's been very hectic at work, at dance camps and, even at my parents'. I needed space.

Back on track now with the biggest smile on my face and my new tap shoes on.

Tap shim sham tonight with Johan x 2 and Maria. Maybe Olle will come too but I don't know. Anton is back in town today, just returned from Tokyo. Welcome back fellow swing music geek.

Your Feet's too big

2009-08-03T10:12:00.002Z

Nope. No Fats Waller being played at the dance last night on the beach here in Malmö. Nonetheless, it was a perfect night with a beautiful sunset, and the rain decided to go away on holiday for awhile. It felt a bit stiff to dance, I thought. I have so many new things to think about when I dance, and also there is this feeling of people "testing you out" after Herräng, seeing how much (or how little) you have improved. It's scary. But it was fun, and we had a BBQ next to the floor.

I left at nine with a friend, with whom I had one of the best and longest talks outside my apartment. We needed that. Hopefully now, I can start clean-slated and be happy with the fact that we are really close friends.

Nawwww!

2009-07-29T21:42:00.002Z

Still relaxing in the archipelago. Off home on Friday. I have a break from everything. In the meantime, I found this adorable photo.

Still thinking of H.

2009-07-23T10:33:00.004Z

Gaaaahhhhhhh!!! I want to go back again!
I think it's inevitable for every dancer returning from Herräng to want to go back. Yes, you may be physically and mentally exhausted, but knowing it's not over up there, makes you want to be part of the whole thing. The picture is of me, Johan, Olle and Maria doing the tap shim sham - first time I ever tried :)

However, I'm sitting here, by the sea, enjoying the sun, trying to recover from the Herräng Flu (or the HDC09 virus). Almost two weeks now. Gah.

I've compiled the info I got from my private lessons, so it looks nice and tidy. I need a lot of social dancing to make all that work, I tell you.

Herräng Post Depression

2009-07-20T13:01:00.001Z

Came to my parents' house in the archipelago to recover yesterday. So much for rehab - I stayed up until five a.m. watching Herräng / dance stuff on Youtube, chatting to people in Herräng on Facebook, posting pictures, emailed people, and ... had chocolate (I had no brownie, so plain chocolate had to do). Today I'll try some tap stuff on the deck outside, accompanied by birds, the sea and wind. That's music too, don't you know?

13 hours of madness

2009-07-18T10:39:00.002Z

Folkets Hus. Theme Party. Think cartoons. Think superheroes. Imagine this small village in Sweden, which not even Swedes themselves have heard of, full of people from all over the world. Most of these people were wearing costumes of some kind. Some came as Superman, some came as the Joker. There was a Spiderman up on the roof. There was also a light reflection of the Batman sign up on the wall of Folkets Hus. Dancing was magnificent. So magnificent indeed, that I stayed up until 9.30 in the morning dancing. Gah. Many new doors opened for me tonight. I finally seemed to grasp the idea of matching your lead's tension, at all times. I hope I can maintain that sensation tonight and, more importantly, later on when I return back home. I feel completely drained today, after not having gone to bed at all. I will now, however, before I need to work with round 4 of Lennart's evening meetings. Last one for me this year. Over and out.

Oh, and what the hell happened there?

2009-07-16T02:31:00.002Z

I'm just wondering what's going on. Today I had the private with Peter. It was really really nice. I feel like I'm thinking too much right now but that's natural. Like letting go of the crutches after surgery, or something. But then, dig this: During the meeting today, some dancers jumped down from the stage (I was watching for a change) and Peter Loggins asked me to dance. Oh yeah baby! I stayed on, and felt pretty tired, but asked some people to dance. Had decent dances. After dancing with Mannesson, Dax came up to me and asked me to dance. Let me repeat that: D A X A S K E D M E T O D A N C E !!

Pretty awesome day folks!!

Swingout!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-07-15T15:16:00.002Z

This routine has really made me love this dance even more. I've learned it in class this year, and I'm totally in love with it. Peter Strom and Ramona are both teaching here this week. Made sure I got a private with Peter today. He was absolutely awesome. Will try to apply some of the stuff we talked about to my dancing. It's of course really basic stuff, but it felt really good and different when I got it, with him. Standing in front of the Frankie memorial in Herräng doing swingouts with this guy was pretty hot. Marry me! Was funny when it made him smile when I had a "weeeee-moment". I love those.

Now, Savoy bacon, Savoy - where your feet start jumpin'...

SWINGOUT!!!!

The Dax

2009-07-14T14:36:00.002Z

"You have to match the Dax!", he exclaimed, as I tried my best to relax. I had a private today, despite a very bad case of the Herräng Flu, (also known as the HDC09 Virus) with Dax Hock. He looks great when he dances. I have sat in on 3 or 4 classes and watched him and partner Alice Mei teach. Their teaching style is different and is all about body awareness when you lead and follow. I find it hard to get the hang of it, and to feel it. During the private we did some excercises together, did some walking and even some dancing. I was told I was too tense in my body all the time and that I should try to match the person I'm dancing with more, or else the dance and connection will cease to exist. I feel confused as ever afterwards, but I've taken notes and I will try to apply some of it when I dance without overdoing it and thinking too much.

Herräng week 1 day 5-6

2009-07-03T10:29:00.002Z

Somehow, entering Folkets Hus on Wednesday was more exciting. I think it was the music. Something made me want to stay until the doors closed. I had a really good night dancing, so I stayed up all night, took a shower with warmish water by myself in the wee hours of the morning before taking a quick nap on the lawn. Yesterday was Cabaret night so I did the curtains for that, working with the acts and Shane McCarthy - who appeared in Lennart's orange seventies outfit. Lennart threw a fit before last night's meeting. He gets upset when things aren't working as planned. He wants flow and perfection.

My body was too tired yesterday for dancing. But tonight - tonight will be a different story.

Herräng 2009 - week 1

2009-07-01T11:36:00.002Z

Ali and I departed on Friday, spending the night in Uppsala at his friend Sus's house. Well-rested, we headed off for Herräng in the morning. Being 3,5 hours early, we thought we'd be able to snatch good beds, but no! We were among the first in the line to take photos for passes (new for this year) though, and got good beds. Again, my roommates are Charlie and Jessica from Stockholm. We've had drinks before the dance every night so far - best thing in the world is when they open a few bottles of beer from their own brewery, Monk's, in Stockholm.

This week I'm taking classes. I had to audition and got into IA3 and it was a bit of a blow to the ego that everyone else from Lund that started dancing after me got into the middle level. I must say though, that I was unlucky to dance with two guys who couldn't do a swingout. One of them started the rockstep on the two. But yeah, it's probably my dancing too.

I've worked with Lennart doing the meetings this week. Fun as usual. Some social dancing too. Yesterday was bluesnight so I didn't dance much then. More dancing tonight,

Herräng Countdown

2009-06-25T14:51:00.002Z

Before I knew it, it's now time to head off for Herräng again. This time I'll stay for three weeks. I'll take courses week 1, work as Stage Manager week 1 and 2, then just dance socially week 3. I'll go with Ali tomorrow via Uppsala, where we'll sleep at his friend's house overnight before heading up to Land of Chaos.

Right now I'm so tired I don't even know my own name. I wish for nothing but a warm bed, hours, days of sleeping. I feel like this BEFORE I go to dance camp. Holy shit. I wonder how I'll survive. Adrenalin I expect.

This is me signing off for now. See you in Herräng with updates as to how I'm decaying physically and mentally while learning to become a better dancer.

Love,
L

Progress

2009-06-23T17:37:00.002Z

Here is a short clip I filmed in Herräng last year, when I'd been dancing for 4 months. Disgusting. I hope I have improved since. The second clip is from... I don't know, but I think a few months ago, so about 12 months worth of dancing? Johan has helped me a great deal, and I'm happy about that. THANK YOU!

Drinking with style

2009-06-23T16:42:00.003Z

I never was a big drinker. I have a few glasses of wine, that's it. Of course, sometimes, shit happens. In Stockamöllan, however, I couldn't resist when Anton made this amazing offer. Once in a lifetime, kids!

A bit of this and a bit of that

2009-06-23T16:26:00.004Z

I've been crap at updating the blog. I know. Very exhausting few months, but things are looking very bright. Herräng is approaching, and I'll go up there on Friday staying for three weeks with everybody. I hope that many of us will put up tents in the same area so we can hang out.

We had a great Midsummer's in Föreberg (like last year). Dancing loads, singing a bit during the early hours of the morning. Someone recommended I read "The Game", by Neil Strauss. It's about pick-up artists and how love-shy men can improve at the art of seduction. After a long discussion about this, I came to a very simple conclusion: So, when it's all said and done, you end up with this person you're attracted to, and you have to be YOURSELF all of a sudden - then what happens? Whether you used the "push-pull" effect with your person of interest or not, you're now left standing there in the nude, forcing yourself to be....well, just you. You know?

Had sandwiches from Subway in the park next to Mejeriet where we dance, yesterday. Thanks O for buying. I had a few glasses of wine. As always, I thought my dancing was brilliant afterwards :).

Stockamöllan

2009-06-17T21:54:00.004Z

This year's Stockamöllan jazz Festival took place this weekend. I went in the car with Anders Malmberg (who took the photos you can see here). Had some fun dances, and really liked the shows Gunhild Carling put on. Saturday's dancing was disappointing due to the fact that the music was overwhelmingly fast and similar all the way through. I didn't feel like dancing so much. We had some classes, my favourite being one where we did kicks in the swingout, and also one called rhythm variations. We ended the weekend by dancing like crazy in a dirty room in the machine hall. When I took a shower I noticed my ankles had gone black from dust getting inside my jeans. It was a dirty job, but someone had to do it.

Monday's dancing was fantastic in mejeriet. I and Mannesson danced alot because we picked 1/3 of the songs each, kind of. Anton danced alot with me too. I totally loved the music and the dancing. Tomorrow, last session with Big Apple. Gotta practise now.

5 days and counting

2009-06-07T20:29:00.002Z

Last week was the most hectic since I started working as a teacher. The police was there two days in a row, and I had eggs thrown on my car too. It was crazy. I was exhausted on Friday. Ali threw an excellent birthday party at his house in Blentarp. I tried an expensive wine, which was absolutely fantastic. Slept there, and came home today. Just been doing chores all day - washing, tidying.

One more week to go. Tomorrow we'll take the kids to Ribban, if the weather is nice. Tuesday we allow them to throw water balloons at us - (should be the other way around, this year...) and other activities. Wendnesday is cleaning day, thursday they all finish. Friday I have to work for awhile to finish the last stuff. Then it's time for Stockamöllan, a week off, then Midsummer's in Föreberg, and then Herräng for 3 weeks. I really can't wait.

After work this week I'll go to the gym, and also try to practise Big Apple. Johan let me come and learn it, and I'm always so grateful that he brings me along to things. It's great!

Vårfest vårfest hela dan!

2009-05-31T09:14:00.007Z

Årets vårfest med Cats' Corner gick av stapeln igår. Nytillskott i form av eldkonstnärer gav festen ytterligare en dimension. Roliga grabbar det där! Dom dansar ju naturligtvis också. Kvällen var mycket angenäm och jag skrattade mer än jag gjort på länge. Underbart sällskap och mycket roliga samtal - skulle man sammanfatta det vi pratade om så fick det nog bli med den gamla devisen "Det var bättre förr!"

Grillfest grillfest hela dan!

2009-05-30T10:06:00.003Z

Svenska idag. Orkar inte tänka på engelska just nu. Jaha, ännu en trevlig kväll med dansgänget. Ca 40 pers inledde sommaren hos Ingrid, med grillning enl. tradition. Mycket trevligt! Alla var där. Ikväll är det vårfest här i Malmö, som jag är med och fixar, så det blir väl att bege sig ditåt snart. Ali sover nog på soffan, som vanligt. Gårdagens höjdare inträffade när en tjej sa: "bästa myggmedlet är öronproppar, så man inte hör ljudet, resten kan man bekymra sig om senare". Vi fortsatte prata, och jag berättade om när jag campade i Yosemite och hur det var att se alla varningstexter om björnar där, och skåpen man var tvungen att låsa in allt i, inklusive sin solkräm som björnarna annars åt upp. Varvid Olle snabbt kläckte den ytterst vältajmade kommentaren:

"Hade du öronproppar mot dom också då?"

Perfekt tajming. Väldigt roligt.

The Great Wind-down

2009-05-27T18:20:00.002Z

Activites, activities, activities, and an immense work-load during the last few weeks before we go on holiday for the summer, is really taking its toll on me. I'm not slowing down, because I like having alot to do. In the past 30 min, I fell asleep on the computer keyboard 3 times. :) Anyway, today saw the light of a reunion at the school I work at. I stayed after work, but couldn't bring myself to do any more grading. My brain couldn't take anymore. Overheated!? So I drew a picture, something I never do anymore, but used to before Internet came along. It was really relaxing. I should do it more often.

Progress

2009-05-24T09:09:00.003Z

Yesterday, Mårten and Emma had a birthday party. Alot of people showed up, around 30 I would say. Quite a large number. Another large number is the attendance of the somewhat 700 that showed up at Tom's dance at Glen Echo last night for Tom Cunningham orchestra. I would have loved to be there. Today I'm buying a tent for Stockamöllan and Herräng, which I think will come in handy. I was also invited to learn (or re-learn?) the Big Apple routine in Lund. I was excited to fill my day with more dancing. Will try to work on a few things in my dancing and see where it takes me. Keeping my body together is one, second thing is to try to dance with a bit more attitude. I have a problem with that, in general, and my body language is nowhere near where I want it to be, not even when I teach. But when I'm on stage - you'll see a different person. I wish I could transfer that feeling to the dance floor, but I will, I'm sure, as I grow more confident, it's all about self conciousness. Third, I've been told to do bigger swivels so I'll work on that too.

I think I've improved when it comes to dancing to fast songs, but I can feel I'm not up to scratch. I think Stockamöllan will help. The music there is insane. It's fast. Three days of that, and you improve. For sure.

Healthwise, I'm going to bed earlier and lost 2,5 kg, by cutting out the junk food.

DJ Battle

2009-05-22T09:45:00.003Z

Last night's dancing was great! (But sweaty!). I danced alot, and we had a DJ battle between Anton, Finn and Mårten. Anton won. All of them did a great job, and I think people enjoyed almost every song last night.

Tonight we're all going to Tuppen again so we can swinout amongst the civilians. Can't wait!

Dance disaster!

2009-05-18T20:55:00.001Z

Yuck bloody yuck. Today was crap. I sucked. Period. Thursday, on the other hand, was probably the best night I've had, dancing. Weird.

In the country

2009-05-17T10:29:00.005Z

Finally got to see Ali's place yesterday. It's funny - we talk every day in one way or another and have done for well, at least six months. Yet, I've never seen his place. A bunch of us went out there yesterday, some walked for hours, I didn't. I had recordings instead. We had a barbecue and lots of fun. Stayed up till 3 in the morning talking. This morning, I woke up, went outside sat in the sun and watched the horses and the beautiful fields.

Another Friday Night

2009-05-16T06:54:00.003Z

Yesterday was practically my last day of teaching. I have a few more weeks to go but there will be mostly field trips and fun stuff. I baked Ali's famous rhubarb cake, but replaced the main ingredient with apples since rhubarb was nowhere to be found.

Today I have two recordings in the studio. After that I'm taking the car out to Ali's where I'll be meeting up with my friends who will have walked for miles and miles.

Herräng / Beach 2009

2009-05-09T07:06:00.002Z

Who cares about the bikini-season? I've never cared, and I never will. What I do care about, however, is to learn how to incorporate routines into my daily life. I've never had them, even when I was a kid. Going to bed a certain time, or having dinner at a certain time never existed. Anyway, I want to get in shape. My body has told me it's unhappy, and that, in return, makes me less happy too. Herräng 2009 - something some of us dance nerds focus on, in order to become a bit more fit.

Here's my deal. I'm going to start to have routines in my life, bit by bit. This past week, I've worked on mainly one thing (everything else was a bonus): to go to bed at 11 and try to sleep 8 hours instead of my normal 6. I think I did pretty well! Maybe twice I slept less than 8 hours. I also managed to skip kebab, McDonald's candy and potato chips. Instead, I ate pea soup alot, and some other easy-to-make stuff. Started doing exercises, very basic.

week 2: This week I'll add a few long walks, and taking the bike to and from work.

Let your body decide

2009-05-05T20:27:00.003Z

Well, the other day I had to face the facts about alot of things. I was exhausted from things that have occupied my mind for quite awhile, but also I have really abused my body by not getting enough sleep, and living off McDonald's, kebab and crisps and such. Now I've decided to sleep a bit more, and eat proper food. Just taken an evening walk with a friend of mine. Been two great days. We'll see if it changes the way I feel and perform.. Hope so.

Lovely

2009-05-03T08:44:00.002Z

This comes pretty close to showing what I love about this dance. The song, the coreography, the bodies and faces - all merged in perfect harmony.

Frankie Manning - Ambassador of Lindyhop

2009-05-03T07:49:00.002Z

Frankie died a few days ago. Sad as it is, I must say it's not bad to live and still dance in your 90s! I never got to meet him but I heard alot of stories from everybody, most of them from Tom who knew him very well. The thing that inspires me about Frankie is his personality. I want to be like that when I dance - love it, love every moment, or pass. Don't dance if your heart is not in it.

Here is Frankie talking to Tom, my best buddy in the whole world:

There must be alot of cats swingin' up in Heaven now!

Crazy busy

2009-05-02T17:33:00.002Z

Thursday we had a barbecue at Håkan's in Lund. Most of the dancers I hang out with were all there. Then, hungover struck, and I spent most of Friday lying on the sofa. Ended the day by going to Johan's in Lund for whiskey sampling. I drove the Malmö people there, which meant I couldn't drink. I didn't really feel like it either yesterday. Anton, Åkers and Birgitta went. Today I've recorded 15 girls at their hen party. Went swell, but after that I had to stress like crazy to get my printer working so I could meet the 5 pm deadline, when someone I recorded last week was supposed to turn up to pick her CDs up. The pic shows the result. Tomorrow, I will grade papers, do my taxes with a friend and meet someone for a bit of wine. Then work the next day.

Deep breath.

Bullfest bullfest hela dan!

2009-04-25T14:19:00.002Z

Vilken kväll! Mannesson, Klingvall och Mia Ripa var hemma hos mig och drack vin igår. Det hela utmynnade i skrattattacker när vi dansade och upptäckte hur svängig Sigge Fursts musik var på sin tid! Här dansar Robert och jag, (lite glada i hatten) till Bullfest, en stor hitlåt! "Klappa takten alla bagarbarn" - tänk! Lite boogie back till det, yeah!!

Mannesson sitter bakom kameran.

New website is up!

2009-04-25T12:47:00.003Z

New website for Catbay Productions, my recording studio, is up. When you get there, click on the Swedish flag, because the English version isn't quite ready. My friend Birgitta helped me set it up in the space of a few hours. THANK YOU! I would have never gotten around to it. I'm very pleased with the result! I had a recording this morning, have another on Tuesday and one on Saturday. Fingers crossed for more!

Frankie95 routine

2009-04-25T12:44:00.002Z

I danced with Anton the other day when we did the Frankie95 routine. We'll practise some more, then film it in better quality- I had the time of my life. I'm in love with the song!

My life has been too hectic this week. I barely had time to breathe, and it was so intense with great things happening like the dance, and not so great things also. But, life goes on. It makes things easier having great people to dance with!

Now I know why all the trees change in the fall

2009-04-21T20:14:00.002Z

I feel on top of things, no matter what. What a great day it's been. A friend helped me update my website for Catbay, so now it looks fine and dandy. Had three bookings for recordings today. Well needed cash for dance related things such as Herräng. I heard a cute song today. Have a listen.

Dinner again

2009-04-12T10:22:00.002Z

I tend to invite people over for dinner very often. It's very handy because it gives me the kick in the ass I need to clean the place and cook. Plus having some company is really great. Hugo loves boys.

When in doubt...

2009-04-12T10:18:00.002Z

When in doubt, head down to the water and lie on the jetty with a mug of coffee as your only company. The ladybird was just an active listener. I think we understood each other. Life really doesn't get much better than this.

Good Friday Aerials in Ystad

2009-04-11T09:17:00.005Z

Johan Norin was kind enough to ask me if I wanted to go to Ystad with a bunch of people to a stunt school and try some aerials. I of course, always want to try things, although I always show initial signs of hesitation before I feel comfortable with something. I was so happy that I got to go, it really was refreshing, and I needed it. The past week has been pretty intense. We tried some back flip type things, and I was surprised to see that I could do them after awhile. I would soooo love to do some more of this, I really liked it. Again, you start at your own level and work from there. So, anytime, I say. Me wants more! :) Yayyy! (Me, Johan, Anne, Ina, Artur, Johan and Birgitta went).

Bounce bounce bounce!

2009-04-08T21:21:00.004Z

Yes, let's face it. The three of us are IN LOVE with the music. We met up tonight and went crazy with the playlists. The theme tonight was "bounce bounce bounce". Anton on the right, Mannesson and Hugo on my left. Three great people, three laptops, three fabulously wonderful playlists - and I don't know how many bottles of whisky with not so much left in them.

WELL, listen to this clip (esp 1.52 forward) tonight's favourite: "Sunny side of the Street" , Dizzy Gillespie. (I met him when I was a kid. He asked me "Do you spell Lina with an "e" or an "i", to which I shrugged (was too bad at English to know the difference). He replied: You don't know how to spell your own name?!"

I should be much too smart for this.

2009-04-05T19:36:00.001Z

I agree.

Um, I don't think so!

2009-04-05T16:50:00.002Z

My cat seems to have found a new hiding place. My underwear drawer.

The window-shopper

2009-04-04T16:00:00.002Z

The window shopper is remotely interested in the final purchase. He's interested in touching and feeling the product, but in the end, usually he decides he cannot afford it. This time.

I sit two stories above the street
Its awful quiet here since love fell asleep
Theres life down below me though
The kids are walking home from school

Some long ago when we were taught
That for whatever kind of puzzle you got
You just stick the right formula in
A solution for every fool

I remember the time when I came so close to you
Sent me skipping my class and running from school
And I bought you that ring cause I never was cool
What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated

So I just sit up in the house and resist
And not be seen until I cease to exist
A kind of conscientious objection
A kind of dodging the draft

The boy and girl are holding hands on the street
And I dont want to but I think you just wait
Its more than just eye to eye
Learn the things I could never apply

I remember the time when I came so close with you
I let everything go it seemed the only truth
And I bought you that ring, it seemed the thing to do

What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
So what makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated

Im just a mirror of a mirror myself
All the things that I do
And the next time I fall Im gonna have to recall
Its isnt love its only something new

I sit two stories above the street
Its awful quiet here since love fell asleep
Theres life down below me though
The kids are walking home from school

Im remember the time when I came so close with you
Sent me skipping my class and running from school
And I bought you that ring cause I never was cool

What makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
So what makes me think I could start clean slated
The hardest to learn was the least complicated
The least complicated
The least complicated

It's Now or Never

2009-04-04T13:47:00.000Z

It turns out, it really IS now or never. I'll try to stick to it.

New Songs

2009-04-03T11:53:00.002Z

I wrote two songs very quickly the other night. I haven't written in 3 years, but I guess sometimes you just have stuff to say to someone. (Lyrics to "My dreams won't let me" go were co-written with Stefan Warnqvist).

The book of Love

2009-03-31T21:36:00.002Z

The book of love is long and boring. No one can lift the damn thing. It's full of charts and figures, and instructions for dancing. Or so, I've heard anyway, according to Peter Gabriel.

Blues in the bunker

2009-03-28T12:59:00.002Z

Tonight, tonight... I'll go bluesdancing in my little black dress and high heels. Looking forward to it. Ali will sleep on my couch again, and I'll probably get slighty intoxicated. We'll have dinner at Mannesson's house before the pre-party at Åkers's place.

Wish me luck.

The Party with the Ancient Custard

2009-03-23T22:07:00.004Z

Ali brought custard to my party without having checked the sell by date. We were all in tears laughing when we realized it was from 1985!! (Older than one of the guests attending the party!) Some brave souls tried it, and there apparently was nothing wrong with the taste!

Is that what love is or should be like?

2009-03-14T16:12:00.004Z

When I spent a year in Dobbs Ferry, New York in 1989 I was 17. It was such a great year, and oh, so exotic. I loved America, and I still love to travel there. Joe, a man I met there spent alot of time helping the homeless poor of Manhattan. We'd go on rides together called the Midnight Run, where we handed out clothes and food to the people on the streets. I remember these late nights like it was yesterday.

However, it wasn't. It's now been 19 years since I was there. I decided to write to Joe and tell him about my new found love for the dance, and the loss of a partner. He wrote me a long letter. He's now 65, and has been married twice. He had this to say about his present relationship,and it really moved me.

"We are so clearly soulmates, or adjacent hearts—or any other language for people meant to be together."

The day I find a man who has a genuine interest in listening to what other people have to say, who can really listen, and is passionate about his own and my goals and needs for the future, I won't hesitate to get married.

Dance events coming up

2009-03-14T13:59:00.002Z

I'm very careful with money now, so that I can go to Herräng and possibly DC this year too. I just signed up for Herräng intermediate/advanced. Should be good. I hope to get to work with Lennart and Gunnar this year too, doing the evening meetings. A dream solution for me would be to only work with the meetings during weeks 1-2, then take classes week 2. I've talked to Hasse & Marie about doing a private lesson with them week 1 also.

The picture is of Tom and Debra's dance team Eight Week Wonders as they were doing an audition for America's Got Talent (Yes, the one where the Hoff is one of the judges). The cool thing is that all the women have the same pants, except debra who doesn't have suspenders on hers. She gave her pair away to ME when I was in DC. :P I love them, thanks again!!

In the midst of everything

2009-03-14T11:17:00.002Z

Last night I went to the pub in Lund with a few people. Had good talks with friends. Actually I kinda like meeting up outside the dances, because you never really get to know someone at the dance. Sure, you dance and you're physical with a person at the dance all the time, but you don't really get to know who they really are. Olle gave me a ride home, which was really nice. It was only 10.30 and I was really tired at that point.

Will go for coffee with a friend now in town and get a taste of the sun, which is pretty rare in these parts. I'll have dinner with Mannesson tonight, then we're off to Mejeriet for a VIP thing before the dancing / fun begins. It's a 10-year jubilee tonight, and it will be very packed.

Wonderful tonight

2009-03-09T22:42:00.002Z

I haven't had tango class for so long. Today I was stand-in for Emma and went to Olle's tango lesson with him. I loved every second of it, and time went by way too quickly. We did ochos forwards and backwards and connection exercises of all kinds. A really nice evening.

Photo of me and Ruben, the tango teacher from previous semester.

Grey

2009-03-09T08:06:00.001Z

Today I'm just really uninspired, and I don't feel like saying anything to anybody or doing anything. Can I have my duvet back please?

At times like these..

2009-03-08T14:27:00.002Z

I just received this picture from my friend Ali on the phone, from Chamonix, where he is skiing (his third week of skiing this year). They are apparently making steaming hot espressos in their outdoor kitchen. It doesn't look half-bad sitting there in the sun, right? I would love to be there too, actually. [As I say this, I find myself turning towards the window, looking out and I see rain. Rain everywhere]. Today is a good day, but a day for being cozy and sleepy :). I have a few people coming over tonight for Livsnjutarorden. Gotta dash.

Confrontations

2009-03-07T11:31:00.002Z

I don't like confrontations. I hate confronting people when I'm unhappy with things, and I don't like talking about my wishes and needs when I'm not sure what the outcome will be.

However, this time I've invested quite alot into something good, and I need to face the music. And dance. Or stand still, depending on what happens.

Now spinning: Fred Astaire: Let's face the music and dance

Pain in the neck

2009-03-04T14:28:00.003Z

I need massage and I need it badly. I have such pain in my back and shoulders right now I could faint. I never have these kind of problems usually. I should spend the money on a spa-thing even if I can't afford it. It hurts :(

An extraordinary encounter

2009-03-02T15:28:00.003Z

And I'm in shock.

I work in a school where I quite often have to teach simple basics like saying "good morning" when you arrive, or taking your shoes off, or taking off your hat in the dining room.

I had the most extraordinary encounter this afternoon, however. I came home, crossed the street to buy a soda in the kebab place, and managed to drop my important paperwork on the wet street. A boy walked past - your stereotyphical "cool" teenager, baggy jeans, expensive sneakers & jacket and a hood covering his head. He walks along with his friends. When he saw the papers, he quickly bent down, picked everything up, looked softly at me saying "Here you are".

Pretty neat.

Busy day

2009-03-01T09:42:00.003Z

I went for coffee with Mårten today, first time in about a year. Nice to talk. After that it was time to go to Mia's party. I wasn't in the mood yesterday, too many thoughts spinning in my head, and I wanted to hide under my duvet, to be honest. But anyway, I went, shut off the rest of the shit, and just had a really good time. I enjoyed trying some Wii, and meeting some of her friends that I hadn't met before. I had good talks with Johan too, about dancing, what else?

Today I'll go with Sara to Center Syd. Haven't seen her in ages.

Tango!

2009-02-28T00:26:00.002Z

Went for dinner with a few people today, Mårten, Emma and Olle. We then went to a tango practica where I tried dancing with the two of them, as well as Igefjord and David Norin. I asked Paul Utter to dance too, he's awesome of course. Pretty cool with loads of swing folks down there in the basement of Tangopalatset.

O and I walked halfway home after, it was pretty cold out.

Amazing! That's all I can say.

2009-02-26T23:00:00.002Z

Yes, tonight was better than I expected. Once again, I decided not to stand and watch. I danced all night, and was exhausted - completely drained, from dancing so much.

Anton's class was all about becoming more aware of the steps you're actually taking, and to really love each and every one of them. I had the privilege of dancing with Anton many times tonight, and I'm in heaven. He's fantastic to dance with. I think it's because I'm totally in love with the music, and I can feel a special thing happening, a connection that's not just physical, with some people who love the music, the way I do.

I also had really good dances with Olle, Antich, Johan N and Johan Å. I love you all, and oooooooooh boy was it great to be me tonight.

Hallelujah. Amen.

Dance season begins - Go Anton!

2009-02-26T08:23:00.002Z

Will start the lindy classes today again. I can't wait. This time, the course will be run by Anton and Matilda. I know most of the people in the class. So far, I've done quite a few courses: Beginner's weekend, Level 1,2 and 3, Intermediate in Lund and Malmö last term, and I'm taking the Intermediate again now. In Stockamöllan last year I also did an Intermediate thing, but for the Snowball thing in Stockholm over New Year's I did Int/Adv, which worked well too.

Right now though for me, it's all about dancing ALOT. Because I'm in love with the music, and sometimes, if only for three minutes, with the guy I'm dancing with. :)

Spotify - no limitations

2009-02-25T23:52:00.004Z

Spotify, the software, allows you to stream any music you can think of, in a matter of seconds. I spend alot of time reading bios, and listening to new music on there. The other day was Fats Waller day. I also checked other stride pianists such as Art Tatum and Erroll Garner. I came to the conclusion that it's better to play with your heart and make the music mean something, than to play a billion notes as fast as you can. (Tatum vs Fats, Robert Wells vs Charlie Norman, for example). Don't get me wrong, some of these are excellent tehnicians, and play very well. The music just doesn't touch me.
Today I've read up on Lester Young and listened to loads of his works. He was apparently nicknamed "Prez" by Billie Holiday who was a close friend of his. He has a soft tone (but in the later recordings it got rougher, perhaps due to his heavy drinking.

Speaking of which, I think I'll have a nightcap.

Now spinning: Body and Soul (Lester Young)

Ain't no mountain high enough

2009-02-24T21:02:00.003Z

Meet Jonas, my sweet colleague, who is in charge of kitchen duties at work this week. He found himself stuck with more than he expected. This pile of dishes is actually worse than my warzone. I must clear it tonight, however, because tomorrow Anders will come over and help me fix my computer.

Now spinning: Ain't no mountain high enough.

Fats Waller - what a gem!

2009-02-23T11:08:00.003Z

I have a thing for Fats Waller at the moment. A master of stride piano, Waller died in 1943, then 39 years old. Sometimes, I wish I had been alive back in the 20s and 30s to see what life really was like. I read a cool story about Fats online:

"His impressive and talented playing once put him at risk of injury. Waller was kidnapped in Chicago leaving a performance in 1926. Four men bundled him into a car and took him to the Hawthorne Inn, owned by gangster Al Capone. Fats was ordered inside the building, and found a party in full swing. Gun to his back, he was pushed towards a piano, and told to play. A terrified Waller realized he was the "surprise guest" at Al Capone's birthday party, and took comfort that the gangsters didn't intend to kill him. According to rumor, Waller played for three days. When he left the Hawthorne Inn, he was very drunk, extremely tired, and had earned thousands of dollars in cash from Capone and other party-goers as tips."

Now spinning: "All that meat and no potatoes". (Didn't know they had Atkin's Diet back then?)

Superman and I at Duke's Place in Gothenburg

2009-02-22T18:55:00.005Z

I went with my tall friend to Duke's Place in Gothenburg. I finally had a really great night dancing. One of the best, in total. It was awesome. I decided not to stand on the side at all, just dance all the songs, so I did, pretty much, and after about forty minutes, something just clicked for me. We'll see if it lasts, but I could really feel a huge difference. Don't ask me what happened, but it seems that something did.

We had a pizza before the dance. Heavy snow, so A. had to change in the car, kinda like Superman. After the dance, we stayed at someone's house, a guy I met in Herräng.

All in all, a wonderful weekend with cooking, lovely company, great dancing and lots of laughter.

Cooking Cajun style

2009-02-21T09:15:00.003Z

Yesterday Olle, Johan N and Håkan came by to cook with me. I had been food shopping, Olle bought the wine, Johan bought cheese and some port with it. My cat Hugo once again abanonded me for a man. He loves them, and HAS to lie on top of them, at all costs. (Smart cat, I've taught him a few good tricks).

It was all very nice: a sweet potato thing with a dip, and a meat jambalaya.

Only thing is, now I'm kinda broke and my kitchen looks like a Beirut warzone. I'm serious. It's bad. Good thing I'm going to try to head off for Gothenburg in a few hours and (god forbid) LEAVE the war zone for 24 hours. Would you believe it?

Dansens Trappa

2009-02-20T07:49:00.001Z

Jag skriver på svenska idag. Känner för det. Ungefär så här försökte jag beskriva känslan för en kompis idag, inspirerad av olika samtal med andra som ger tips:

"Jag tror att jag börjar känna mig rätt säker i grunderna, mitt huvud är före vad gäller hur jag vill att det ska se ut och kännas när det blir DANS av det hela, och kroppen hänger inte riktigt med i den utvecklingen. Man stannar på ett trappsteg. Det krockar med vad man faktiskt kan, och just då känns det som man inte kan göra en vanlig swingout ens."

Det är faktiskt ganska nära sanningen tror jag. Ska bli skönt när den känslan försvinner. Go away, go away!

I'm good!

2009-02-19T23:23:00.003Z

I'm in a weird phase when it comes to my dancing. I feel like I can't do even a triple step properly. Well, I'm going to put those feelings away, right now. I love dancing with my boys at the dance. It's not about how technical you are. I just want to enjoy the ride, as much as possible. But I'm at a phase, where I can't perform with my body what my head is telling me.

I've learned loads in a year.
I love the music and I think it shows.

Anyway, I'm really happy that I'll have a nice dinner with Olle, Johan and Håkan tomorrow, here in my apartment. We'll cook Cajun style food. Very nice. I hate lonely Fridays.

AND, Tom Koerner just gave me one of the nicest compliments I've ever had in my life:

"You are a social butterfly."

When things slow down

2009-02-19T11:01:00.002Z

When things slow down, the pieces of the puzzle actually start falling into place. I've managed to do tons of stuff this week, when I'm off work. I've written emails to Lennart and Gunnar about working with them in Herräng this year, gone for coffee with friends, danced lots, tidied the apartment, done the washing, gone to the gym 3 times, and going to get a haircut tomorrow, I believe.

Just great to stay home and not go anywhere for the whole week. I'll go to Göteborg on Saturday to dance though with some friends.

On tonight's agenda: strong coffee, dancing my butt off, and perhaps with it - a fine glass of white wine. One must support our dance community the best at one's ability.

However, three glasses would be the end of the world as we know it.

Ooobi doo, I wanna be like youuu

2009-02-17T15:58:00.003Z

Just look at them. They don't have too many troubles in life to worry about. I, on the other hand, have spent too much energy today worrying about:
1. Money. (Not having enough of it seriously sucks. I will make a budget tonight, and then I will put an ad out on Bröllopstorget for Catbay so I can get some more jobs. I hear it's very lucrative.

2. Dance angst - it happens sometime, and I can't help it. I usually think I'm pretty good, but yesterday a girl at the dance said a few things which made me feel like I'd just come out of the beginner's weekend at Tangopalatset. Seriously, what happened there? "Is it the style you aren't comfortable with, or is it the tempo?" (this was a mid/slow tempo song!) Well, I thought I was doing okay until that made me think the opposite.

I only listen to/seek advice from Tom Koerner and Johan N anyway, so I won't spend any more energy worrying about it.

The martians are coming

2009-02-16T13:45:00.003Z

This clip made me laugh today, and I almost choked on my coffee.

I think most men I know (dancers) are from Mars, judging from the way they speak (or don't speak), act and re-act. I think it's probably not a concidence that most of them wear UFO dance pants. Having said that, there must be some damn fine dancing on Mars!

Lindy Hop Deluxe

2009-02-15T15:46:00.003Z

This weekend saw 100 new, eager, happy beginners learn the basics of the dance at Tangopalatset. Emil & Emelie taught most of them upstairs, while Matilda and Anton had a smaller group downstairs. I handed out some tickets for Thursday's dance, but decided to stay in case they needed any extra help. I helped out a bit as a lead today. I went with Anton and them to a café for lunch.

Last night was great. I was judging the Jack n Jill competition with Sten, Love from Gothenburg, Ulrike and Matilda. Anne and Patrik won. Mannesson came third, very good job there!! It must have been the groovy style or just the red tie. I don't know.

I had some fantastic dances with Anton yesterday, including the last song which was a live performance recording of Ella - 10 minutes long! I was in heaven.

Happy Valentine's - to me.

2009-02-14T09:44:00.003Z

I'm a sucker for nice presents. Giving them, receiving them, it doesn't really matter to me. Both is nice. Today I'd like to send out a shout to myself before I say something nice to everybody else.

Have a great day, enjoy your own company and dance your ass off tonight.
xxx

To everybody else that I know: Bring out the best in yourselves, and make today a special day for YOU. By doing that, you'll do everybody else a favour too by being the best version of yourself that you can be.

Simon and Garfunkel - a love story

2009-02-13T13:28:00.004Z

The love of my life. I haven't yet had the pleasure of experiencing it, but my love of the music of Paul Simon has come pretty close. The love affair started when I was 12 years old, maybe 10. I listened to the Greatest Hits tape and learned to sing The Boxer, by heart. And "Slip Slidin' Away". When I hear it, I thought about me and my parents' trip to America in 1979. I remember palm trees, I remember cowboy boots. I remember wide pants. I remember Disneyland and me being terrified of Captain Hook. I remember jacuzzis and swimming pools in Palm Springs. I remember the highway and Americana music on the radio. Slip Slidin' away...

In school, I started taking cello lessons. Don't ask me why, I hated it more than anything. Nowadays I find it pretty nice to listen to. In the 8th grade, I fell totally in love with Magnus, the guitar teacher in our school. He was a star! And I was even more in love with Paul Simon, whom I used to worship back home. I could fingerpick many of the songs already. I was a fast and eager learner, and it paid off. Decided to go to New York for a year after 9th grade, beause PAUUUUL lived there. Crazy, yes, but it was the best year of my life.

I remember sitting in the back seat of the car as my host was driving in Manhattan at night...oh what a sight - the skyline was magnificent for a little chick like me! I of course, never met Paul there, but I did go to see his office.

Back home, a year later, I heard that he was to play in Sweden. I was in tears, and in shock at the same time. I couldn't believe it. My hero for years and years. In front of me. For real. Unbelievable.

I'll leave you with a fine song "Soft Parachutes" from the movie One Trick Pony from 1980. I was in America when I heard this for the first time, and it made a big impression on me. I had to learn it. I loved my life and the people in it. A perfect year.

Time marches on.

Anarchy , but not only in the UK

2009-02-11T23:18:00.003Z

Hmm.
Pens on floor.
Pieces of paper on floor.
Drawings on desks.
Grafitti on brick wall outside.
People teasing each other.
People running around not staying in the classroom.
Water on floor.
Screaming and shouting.
Fighting.
Calls to parents.

What happened to teaching?
I'm exhausted. Who knew I had to act police woman and Kindergarten teacher to 16-year-olds? All at the same time.

Looking forward to big weekend of dancing.

Quick stop drop

2009-02-06T00:26:00.002Z

Thank you Johan for giving me a well-needed vitamin injection today! I got to try the quick stop drop, as seen in Jean Veloz's Groovie Movie - it was so much fun! I so needed that, for many reasons.

check 1:22. I also LOVE the switches afterwards. All the boys in DC did those in every dance, but only one guy has done it here since I came back. Funny how the dance repertoire of moves varies from city to city, from venue to venue.

To my friends

2009-02-04T13:10:00.002Z

Thank you for inspiring me. Thank you for enjoying my company. Thank you for giving so much of yourselves to me. I am very fortunate. Sometimes when life leaves a bit too much to wish for, I'm very happy to have you around. I want to dance. Now, and always.

"Your Own Worst Enemy"

You can't sleep at night
You can't dream your dream
Your fingerprints on file
Left clumsily at the scene

Your own worst enemy has come to town
Your own worst enemy has come to town

Yesterday the people were at ease
Baby you slept in peace
You closed your eyes and saw her
You knew who you were

And your own worst enemy has come to town
Your own worst enemy has come
Your world keeps turning round and round
But everything is upside down
Your own worst enemy has come to town

There's a face you know
Staring back from the shop window
The condition you're in
Now you just can't get out of this skin

Ah ah ah
Ah ah ah
Ah ah ah
Hooo...

The times they got too clear
So you removed all the mirrors
Once the family felt secure
Now no one's very sure

Your own worst enemy has come to town
Your own worst enemy's come
Everything is falling down
Your own worst enemy has come to town
Your own worst enemy has come
Everything is falling down
Your own worst enemy has come to town
Your flag it flew so high
It drifted into the sky

I need inspiration.

2009-02-03T10:05:00.002Z

Anyone got some ideas?

Moving on

2009-01-30T08:14:00.001Z

Busy weekend coming up. I'm quite glad. I need to keep myself busy. Big dance party tonight, karaoke party tomorrow and dinner at a friend's house on Sunday. Uh oh. The bills. Must pay those too. Oops..